I first noticed this awhile back when some friends were mad at each other, for whatever reason (I DON'T CARE! NOT MY BUSINESS!), and they were talking about each other on Facebook. Now I refuse to take sides when people do this and I really think it is a bad idea when people get in Facebook fights. I've been there and it really doesn't end well. It is one thing to fight about politics or whatever you choose to fight about that isn't personal. But when you start posting things about family members or friends or friends of friends or whatever.....well it can get REAL ugly REAL fast. Again, I know from personal and painful experience.
High School Case in point. Last Sunday. On Saturday night it started....a "friend" of mine on Facebook (she is actually my youngest son's friends sister) started posting some really mean stuff about her brother and then made a REALLY offensive post about her brothers girlfriend. Apparently they had all gotten into a huge fight that day and they left the sisters house. Anyway, to try and make this REALLY long story short. My son made a comment about how perhaps she shouldn't be saying this personal stuff on Facebook and how it is only going to make her brother mad, that it was not going to help the situation. Well the girl went insane and started this huge deal on Facebook, which I got caught up in when I got awakened by several phone calls in the morning from the sister. She left me a voicemail on one of them where she told me that I needed to rein in my son before he got his ass kicked. Now, first of all let me explain. This woman is almost my oldest daughters age, which is 29, ALMOST 30! My son is 22! He is a grown ass man! WHY would you call his mom? High school anyone? THEN I posted a response because I read the comments and saw that her 35+ year old boyfriend was making threats to my son. I told them that #1) NONE of this stuff was anyone's business, that they should NOT be posting their "family business" on Facebook. #2) I was not involved as it was NOT my business but they made it my business by calling my house numerous times and making threats #3) NOT a good idea to make threats via voicemail and via Facebook. #4) My son is a grown ass man and can take care of himself wtf are you calling me for, what are we back in HIGH SCHOOL?!!!!
It just got worse from there, although the ONLY comments made to me were from the boyfriend who stated that he was just telling my son what the consequences were if he kept posting stuff...lol...not threats. To which I told him that he could call it what he wanted but a threat is a threat in the eyes of the law. The sister made NO COMMENTS to me (why? I don't know, scared? respect? beats me). Her friend made a comment that is too lewd to post and if I knew where she lived I would ask her to say it to my face.....IF I WAS IN HIGH SCHOOL!!!!
Anyway, the day just got worse and worse....why? Because these ADULTS were acting like they were in high school....making high school threats and talking smack about each other. In the end I helped the adults on my end (my son, his friend, and his friends girlfriend) do the calm thing and call the police to help them get their stuff from the sisters house, since it was raining and the 35 year old boyfriend had already tried to get physical with my son when my son ran into them at a music store the same day. These 2 ADULTS also purposely put their 10 year old daughter behind my son's car so that he couldn't pull out of the parking spot so that they could have this confrontation. These are adults? Parents? WHO DOES THESE THINGS????? HIGH SCHOOLERS!!!! The sister also thought it was a great idea to keep posting insulting stuff online and went as far as to make up a fake Facebook profile under her brothers girlfriends name and posted nearly naked pictures and sent "friend requests" from this fake profile to all of her brother's friends, me and her FATHER included. I have a daughter the same age (19), if she had done this to MY daughter we wouldn't be having this conversation, I'd be in jail for assault. She got the pictures from the cell phone of the girlfriend. She had REFUSED to let her have the phone back when the police went to the house. This is typical high school, "I hate you and I'm gonna get you back" behavior. Someone who is that age REALLY should know better by now. It is so petty and ridiculous!
Here's the thing. This is not the first example of this kind of behavior that I have seen exhibited by adults who REALLY should know better. I've seen 30 and 40 year-olds doing the same type of stuff. What the hell is wrong here?!!! We are ADULTS!!! Calling peoples moms? Telling people you are not gonna be their friend if you are friends with someone they don't like? Seriously? Cut the childhood high school bullshit behavior! What kind of example are these adults sending their own children???? Many of them DO have children and many of those children are old enough to be on Facebook and see this behavior.
How can we teach our kids when some of us need to learn ourselves. I have found that the online community is just as cliquey as any high school. I've seen it on many forums and on Facebook, MySpace, you name it.....I am just stunned, TRULY stunned by this kind of childish behavior. In my case, things got extreme here....police were called. You know why? Because with threats being made and people unable to restrain themselves someone could get hurt. More than feelings are at stake here. People have committed suicide from some of this same kind of stuff. Cyber-bullying is becoming more common and some of the biggest bullies are adults.
So here is my deal. If you don't like someone, don't be their friend. Don't be their friend in real life and don't be their friend in cyberspace. If you are pissed at someone....I don't know, maybe write them a PRIVATE e-mail or message.....or call and talk to them....or DON'T talk to them at all.....DON'T post a bunch of crap about them on the internet. Once words are said, they can't be unsaid. Once out in cyberspace, they are out there forever. If you don't like one of my friends....well I'm sorry, there is a reason why they are my friend as there is a reason why YOU are my friend. IF you ask me to choose, I won't. YOU will be the one to make that choice. I won't betray one friend for another. You don't have to be friends with each other. I won't talk shit about either of you to each other. I AM NOT IN HIGH SCHOOL!!!!!!!
Seriously.
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